Sunday, October 23, 2011
只要一个能真心告诉我，“我爱你，因为你是你（I love you for who you are)”的男人。
只要一个能真心告诉我，“我爱你，因为你是你（I love you for who you are)”的男人。
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Another movie review.
Two long-timed friends stayed over during the Raya break, had some fun catching up.
One of them is an early riser, so when the rest of us refused to get up to kick start activities of the day, she will kill her time watching dvds.
Her compliments my good collections of dvds reminded me of the many dvds that I have collected but not watched: 'A Single Man' starring Colin Firth and Julian Moore is of them.
Do we need to say more about Colin Firth superb acting? If you think "The King's Speech" is awesome, you should have watched 'A Single Man'. Well, it is true that the later won Colin Firth an academy award for best actor, but again, movie preference remains something very personal, no?
In this motion picture, Colin Firth played George Falconer, an English Literature Professor, teaching, from England, teaching in LA, sometime around the 60s.
The main plot of the movie lies on how did George cope after the untimely death of Jim, his 16 years long-termed gay partner.
Colin quietly brought audience to experience the devastating experience of losing the love of your life.
Left all alone in the beautiful home they shared, it became extremely hard for George to recover from the pain, every corner he turns, their memory lingers:how they met, their pets that were gone in the same, their conversation about the boy next door etc.
He decided to put his suffering to an end, by ending his life.
On the chosen day, he went to teach as usual, except he cleaned up his room.
In the last class of his life, he deserted the original teaching plan and went on to discuss about fear ---mankind's fear of unknown, of minority - it was actually an expression of his feeling as gay man in his time. George was not even allowed to attend the wake of Jim, and Jim's parent did not even want to inform him of the death.
One of his student, Kenny, approached him after the class. Kenny has this inquisitive look in his eyes, searching constantly or seeking out for something. It turned out that Kenny has been following George closely, close enough to ask for his address from George's secretary, close enough to notice that George has tidied up his room, and asked "Are you going somewhere?"
Kenny was drawn to George for some reason, a reason that perhaps he knew but refused to admit.
George went on to clear his safe in the bank, determined to seal his life.
Lying all the titles, bonds, keys, all his belongings on his desk, he rehearsed the last act of life.
He tried to find the most comfortable position, a trial was run on whether he should lie his head on a pillow, his has even spread a duvet over his bed, fearing that his blood will stain the mattress, I don't know. He tried the position of holding his pistol to shot right into his mouth.
I felt his choice for committing suicide was not too beautiful for a gay man.
George went to meet his long-time friend, Charley, both of them went way far back to the days when he was in London. Charley was once George's lover, before he came out clean to himself.
They had a great time indulging themselves in some nice music and of course Gin, they talked about days in London and plans of returning. Their conversation dwell onto the page on relationship. Charley said something to the extent -- The thing you have with Jim, is something that I never had, not even with Richard (her husband).Wow, the same goes to me, I am not in their stage of life, say in their 50s or 60s, but again, I have a feeling that I am hardened as times goes by and it is getting more and more difficult to blend into my very settled life at the moment. I must have love this man so much, to have allowed him a space in my life now, if he ever comes.
After the farewell session with Charley, George dashed to his hang out bar to buy more drinks, he met Kenny again, they went for naked swim by the sea, at night.
The sound of the ebb, the laughter of the two men on their crazy actions, the dark background looming. That was a mixture of feelings - this doesn't seem right to be the end of life.
George, died that night, after he decided not to end his life.
He died of heart attack.
How ironic, the trick life plays on us.
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Sunday, August 21, 2011
I have watched this movie twice recently - once Rose came over and wanted to find a movie that we could watch together- could not resist the Dvd happily lying in front of us, popped into the player and finished it - a lighthearted romance comedy perfect for a 'girlie' pillow talk night.
Yesterday, after a pretty busy Sunday- practically running around places:laundry, lunch with bff, toilet cleaning, haircut, dinner and city tour with colleague for the upcoming event this weekend - I came home to continue my laundry, and while waiting for it, I have watched it again.
This time, it daunted upon me that the movie has far more bearings and I was wrong to have brushed it off lightly the first time as any other killing time rom-com. Or perhaps, it clicked with my lost soul at the moment.
The script is delighting, I would have a man that has Alex's type of humour - dry yet intelligent to a certain extent. For instance, when Sophie said she will wear bright orange to be noticeable to him in the cab to pick her up from her place, he replied, "and you can get some roadwork done while waiting...."
The first thing that came to me, "How stupid!" , but it was indeed funny.
It was a story of a man and woman finding their way back into love by finding themselves. Both Alex and Sophie have 'luggage' that they lugged along life; Alex, who never regain fame after coming solo from a popular band in the 80s,struggles with his song writing; Sohpie, a English literature grad - a talented writer who could never pen anything after a horrible love episode in life, tries hard to find a way of defining her life.
Alex thinks that his music is dessert while big names he idolised like Rolling Stone, Bob Dylan, Beatles wrote dinner. He never believe that he could write a 'dinner' piece - yet he could and he did, if he stood up to defend his belief in what is good and not pandering to others, like how he did with the leading 'booty-shaking' Zen-yet so called sexual icon - Cora, for who he and Sophie created the song 'Way Back into Love' - a song for people who were uncertain and wary about getting back into love. The piano intro was simple yet beautiful, Alex allowed Cora to revamp the intro by some rapping and Indi-liked music to allow her confidence and sexual display dance move - Sohpie likened Cora's move as killing two culture at the same time - she called it some sort of "Gandhi type orgasm".
Sophie, on the other hand, never came out from her failing love episode, and never learned to carry herself in front of the jerk turned national best through a novel depicting the love story of a young literature student with her professor.
By constructing a character based on Sohpie's character, the only novelty in the nation's bestseller work is his ability to demonise an ex-lover- an aspiring young writer - magnifying her shortcomings and calling her a mimic, which proved to be fatal to her writing career.
She shivered when faced with the photo of the jerk displayed in a bookstore she and Alex passed by and could not even finish a sentence of her thousand-time-rehearsed speech-"Bumping into the jerk speech" when she came across the jerk in a restaurant with Alex.
In a confronting scene, Alex told Sophie, "You think life is this fairytale, but when it turns out that everything doesn't end happily, you cannot deal with it!"
A line that hit me most.
I have thought life is this fairytale - not that I could have everything I want, but why can't things stay good as it is ? Things changed, people changed over time, and I suddenly find that I am the one remained inertia.
It is then time for me to change my mindset, and perhaps then I could find myself, and a way back to love ?